It's been one year since I left home to start the camino. One year to this day.
I remember that for a full two months before this day, I had visited
MEC endlessly to purchase & exchange gear that I believed I would need on this trek. I remember how I had researched as much as I could in detail about how to get from London to Biarritz to St. Jean Pied-de-Port. I remember printing out dozens of maps and being very concerned about how I would arrive at London Gatwick airport in the morning and somehow need to make it to Stansted by the end of the day.
I can remember getting to the airport with nothing else than a carefully measured and routinely packed 18 lb. backpack and being ready - eager and nervous, but ready.
I can't say that I'm the same person. But today, in a quiet moment, I re-read my post from the last day I walked,
the day I entered Santiago de Compostela, and I was shocked at who that person was and what incredible clarity I had that day and the days before it leading up to it.
It is very difficult to know whether I will be able to regain that clarity. I think we go through an infinite amount of distraction through our daily lives, self-made or otherwise, that can be nothing but the blur we see everyday.
But today, I believe that I need this. I need to feel the same driving force, the ability to bare down to the essentials and then some. Unfortunately, it seems beyond difficult to achieve it physically, especially when it comes to our daily routine and responsibility.
Still, I hope, no, I am determined to begin the journey again - just in a different way.
Stick around,
mi amigos, there's more to come. And
buen camino to the peregrinos, those who are just beginning, those who have arrived, and those who are still searching wherever they are:
Ultrea!